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Annual New Year’s Day prep 31 Dec 2012 @ 17:00

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana, Life in the Southern Command HQ , comments closed

Okay all you Southern Command constituents, it’s that time of year to make preparations for the annual New Year’s Day tradition of black-eyed peas.

Here’s a good recipe for the peas.

Now remember, the tradition is

The practice of eating black-eyed peas for luck is generally believed to date back to the Civil War. At first planted as food for livestock, and later a food staple for slaves in the South, the fields of black-eyed peas were ignored as Sherman’s troops destroyed or stole other crops, thereby giving the humble, but nourishing, black-eyed pea an important role as a major food source for surviving Confederates.

Today, the tradition of eating black-eyed peas for the New Year has evolved into a number of variations and embellishments of the luck and prosperity theme including:

•Served with greens (collards, mustard or turnip greens, which varies regionally), the peas represent coins and the greens represent paper money. In some areas cabbage is used in place of the greens.

•Cornbread, often served with black-eyed peas and greens, represents gold.

And finally, some things to remember whilst you go about your celebrating:

•For the best chance of luck every day in the year ahead, one must eat at least 365 black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day.

•Black-eyed peas eaten with stewed tomatoes represent wealth and health.

•In some areas, actual values are assigned with the black-eyed peas representing pennies or up to a dollar each and the greens representing anywhere from one to a thousand dollars.

•Adding a shiny penny or dime to the pot just before serving is another tradition practiced by some. When served, the person whose bowl contains the penny or dime receives the best luck for the New Year, unless of course, the recipient swallows the coin, which would be a rather unlucky way to start off the year.

The catch to all of these superstitious traditions is that the black-eyed peas are the essential element and eating only the greens without the peas, for example, will not do the trick.

ThatIsAll&#153

And enjoy your celebration responsibly. You are hereby ordered to return to duty promptly on January 2nd. Do I make myself clear, soldier?

Yes? Then DISMISSED!&$153

It’s that time of year again 24 Dec 2012 @ 08:49

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana , comments closed

Well, seeing that I haven’t posted anything is QUITE some time and given it is that time of year….here’s the annual installment of a certain General-type we all know and love.

General Claus’ Visit
To: All Personnel

  1. 1. An official visit by MG Santa (NMI) Claus is expected at this headquarters 25 December 2012. The following instructions will be in effect and govern the activities of all personnel during the visit:
  2. a. Not a creature will stir without official permission. This will include indigenous mice. Special stirring permits for necessary administrative actions will be obtained through normal command channels. Mice stirring permits will be obtained through the office of OSURG, Veterinary Services.

    b. Personnel will settle their brains for a long winter nap prior to 2200 hours, 24 December 2009. Uniform for the nap will be: Pajamas, cotton, light, drowsing, with kerchief, general purpose, camouflage; and Cap, camouflage w/ear flaps. Equipment will be drawn from CIF prior to 1900 hours, 24 December 2012.

    c. Personnel will utilize standard ration sugar plums for visions to dance through their heads. This item will be drawn from the servicing dining facility.

    d. Stockings, wool, cushion sole, will be hung by the chimney with care. Necessary safety precautions will be taken to avoid fire hazards caused by carelessly hung stockings. Unit Safety Officers will submit stocking hanging plans to this headquarters prior to 0800 hours, 24 December 2012, ATTN: AEAGA-S, for approval.

    e. At the first sign of clatter from the lawn, all troops will spring from their beds to evaluate noise and cause. Immediate action will be taken to tear open the shutters and throw open the window sashes. ODCSOPS Plan (Saint Nick), Reference LO No. 3, paragraph 6c, this headquarters, 2 February 1995, will be in effect to facilitate shutter tearing and sash throwing. Division chiefs will familiarize all personnel with procedures and are responsible for ensuring that no shutters are torn open nor window sashes thrown prior to start of official clatter.

    f. Prior to 2400, 24 December 2012, all personnel will be assigned “Wondering Eye” stations. After shutters are thrown and sashes are torn, these stations will be manned.

    g. ODCSLOG will assign one each Sleigh, miniature, M-66, and eight (8) deer, rein, tiny, for use of MG Claus’ driver who, in accordance with current directives and other applicable regulations, must have a valid SF 56 properly annotated by Driver Testing; be authorized rooftop parking and be able to shout “On Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer and Vixen, up Comet, up Cupid, on Donner and Blitzen.”

  3. 2. MG Claus will enter quarters through standard chimneys. All units without chimneys will draw Chimney Simulator, M-6, for use during ceremonies. Chimney simulator units will be requested on Engineer Job Order Request Form submitted to the Furniture Warehouse prior to 19 December 2012, and issued on DA Form 3161, Request for Issue or Turn-In.
  4. 3. Personnel will be rehearsed on shouting “Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.” This shout will be given on termination of General Claus’ visit. Uniformity of shouting is the responsibility of division chiefs.

__CHRISTOPHER K. RINGLE__
Colonel, US
OIC, Special Services

BREAKING: No it’s not about the budget… 6 Apr 2011 @ 15:27

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana, Breaking News , comments closed

…and probably not as newsworthy as the budget debate, so sue me.

It is one of those things that I like to call “Things ta make ya go hmmmmmm” though.

Check out what I’m referring to here and head back here because there’s some insider information below.

Well, now that you’ve read the news here’s the insider stuff. The General and Generalette attended the opening show for Glenn’s Spring tour recently and he had some news he wouldn’t completely divulge but did give some REALLY strong hints about. The crack intel team here at the base tells me that this move is not completely outside of what Glenn hinted at, and actually provides more proof that other major changes are probable.

Glenn stated that while this wasn’t his first trip to the Southern Command surveillance area, it wasn’t going to be his last and in fact he said he couldn’t rule out that moving to this part of the country wouldn’t be a bad idea. At this point the Generalette and I looked at each other and almost simultaneously exclaimed “Hot DAMN”. Rush has already moved his complete operations to the Southern Command Southeastern Sector (aka Florida), so it makes sense that Glenn would also potentially want to move shop to more hospitable surroundings here south of the Mason-Dixon Line.

Darth, Glenn stated that offers of steaks and copious quantities of beef have been extended to his offices if they were to move to your overwatch sector. Would you have anything to do with them???? Just be advised, the Southern Command has a highly more coveted product (for Glenn) that is manufactured almost nearly in our literal backyard. The General will personally visit this manufacturer to ensure several 53′ semi-trailers of their product gets delivered to the Mercury Radio Arts offices if they decide to move into the protection of the Southern Command. So yes, it’s on!!!

Folks, basically what is one thing that is keeping Glenn and his staff in NYC? The television show. It’s a network show, the network offices and studios are there in NYC. If there’s no TV show, there’s no reason to stay in one of the most heavily taxed cities, county, and states in the country (if not THE most heavily taxed). As I said earlier, Rush moved his operations to Florida many moons ago and has proven repeatedly that a conservative radio talk show does not have to originate out of NYC or Californication in order to work efficiently. Just to get away from all the taxation (without representation).

We here at the Southern Command look forward to whatever Glenn and his staff decide to do or move to. It just needs to be down here is all. PERIOD.

ThatIsAll&#153

You mean there are “evil” church pastors???? 18 Mar 2011 @ 14:53

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana , comments closed

NHO WHAI!!!!!!!

Yes whai, and if you thought not you’d better go check out this article and then go look up Jeremiah Wright, and Jim Wallis.

“What they have put out there is a message of intolerance and of hate,” said Nate Phelps.

Pretty strong words coming from the estranged son of the Westboro Church (I refuse to put Baptist in there because no right-minded Bible believing Baptist would allow themselves to be associated with Fred Phelps’ so-called church) pastor. But he’s got a point, especially when you take this next statement into consideration.

“He [Fred Phelps] not only was this violent, cruel and insensitive person with other humans but he insisted that we be that way.”

Lovely. So not only is the pastor not leading his church in the proper ways of the Bible, but he’s forcing his whacked out beliefs on his family. That’s one sick dude.

And in this article, it seems things just get worse…..

An estranged son of anti-gay Kansas pastor Fred Phelps said Wednesday that the spiritual leader of Westboro Baptist Church hit his wife and beat his children with a mattock handle until they bled.

“I think what he does out there is evil,” said Nathan “Nate” Phelps, …

I’ll have to check with Security Services real quick on this one, but I’m fairly certain that would qualify as ASSAULT AND BATTERY.

Yes, the Bible does say that homosexuality is wrong, just check out Leviticus and other places in the New Testament. But what Fred Phelps is doing and the way he is doing it by primarily rioting fallen soldiers funerals’ is absolutely wrong. And contemptuously close to being anti-American in my estimation. Nate Phelps should be commended for calling what his father does, exactly what it is.
Evil, plain and simple.

Dismissed&#153

Movie quotes trivia 8 Sep 2010 @ 20:47

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana , comments closed

…Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone. Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone.

The red zone is for loading and unloading of passengers only. All unoccupied vehicles will be towed.

…Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone. Darth Venomous, white courtesy phone.

No, the WHITE courtesy phone.

Just a quick note 2 Jul 2010 @ 18:31

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana, Life in the Southern Command HQ , comments closed

The current foul weather patterns here in the area of the Southern Command HQ aren’t even close the disgustingly ill-tempered, and exceedingly…….let’s just say I could spit nails faster than a A-10 Warthog can sling lead from the front nose canon. As a means of trying to calm down I went out searching for some words of wisdom from our third president, Thomas Jefferson. Weird, yes, I know. But I needed to do something while I was waiting on the good home-cooked dinner from the Generalette to cool off a wee bit!!!

As we celebrate our independence as a nation this weekend, when you hear “Land of the free” and “Home of the brave”, please remember that our nation IS the “land of the free” BECAUSE of the brave. Men like Jefferson, Washington, Franklin, Adams, and the rest of the Founding Fathers started this nation down a path that now has unfortunately been side-tracked, kicked to the curb, thrown under the bus, and just plain run roughshod for wayyyyyyyy too long. Spend a few minutes to read and CONTEMPLATE what Jefferson wrote and see how well he has foreshadowed what is now happening.

“When the government fears the people there is liberty;
when the people fear the government there is tyranny.”

“I, however, place economy among the first and most important republican virtues, and public debt as the greatest of the dangers to be feared.”

“The two enemies of the people are criminals and government, so let us tie the second down with the chains of the Constitution so the second will not become the legalized version of the first.”

“I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them.”

“When the representative body have lost the confidence of their constituents, when they have notoriously made sale of their most valuable rights, when they have assumed to themselves powers which the people never put into their hands, then indeed their continuing in office becomes dangerous to the State, and calls for an exercise of the power of dissolution.”

ThatIsAll™

SCOTUS takes 234 years to confirm Second Amendment 29 Jun 2010 @ 06:00

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana , comments closed

While it took damn long enough to happen, happen it did. Today the Supreme Court confirmed the right each of us already knew and have known for 234 years, as Americans we DAMN SURE can own firearms for our self-defense. WND has the best coverage I found here.

In the 2008 Heller case, the court ruled that the 2nd Amendment’s right to be armed was an individual right, but that case pertained only to the District of Columbia. With today’s decision in the case brought by Otis McDonald of Chicago, the high court applied that definition to all the states as well.

“The right to keep and bear arms must be regarded as a substantive guarantee, not a prohibition that could be ignored so long as the States legislated in an evenhanded manner,” Justice Samuel Alito wrote for the majority.

Well I’ll be.

The problem I see in this is that the SCOTUS HAD to even take up this case in the first place. Clearly the progressives on BOTH sides of the ticket have derailed the Constitution enough that it takes a case like this to put the Second Amendment back where it belongs. It’s appalling what these self-righteous power whores and their willing accomplices in the lap-dog media and the “heavies” pulling enforcement via union thuggery have done to this country. They need to be thrown out the door.

I for one am glad that the SCOTUS did the right thing. This will hopefully keep us all from going “Da, comrad” anytime soon.

Why yes, today was Mother’s Day (CORRECTION) 9 May 2010 @ 22:33

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana, Life in the Southern Command HQ , comments closed

Just a quick note from the Commanders desk: Yes, the General is still alive and kicking. I’m just having to deal with an oily mess right now. In the meantime though, here’s a little reminder for everyone…..

Yes, today was indeed Mother’s Day. A day to celebrate all those things that mom has done for us. A day where mom get pampered and taken out to lunch or dinner. All that stuff.

But not to overlook the significant other events of May 9, let’s move over to the radar desk and see what else appears on the screen.

– For you sweet tooth dessert folks, today was also Nation Butterscotch Brownie Day.
– In honor of those of Dutch heritage, today was also National Windmill Day.
– Those of you who have a knack for all things tailoring, today was Hurray for Buttons Day.
– We’ve all seen the warnings, but the rebel in you took over…well here’s your day….it was Tear the Tags Off the Mattress Day.

And finally, this last one requires extreme solemnity, nay a full TWENTY-ONE GUN SALUTE!

Room, atten-hut!

For all those who have lost one or more of these over the years, today was:

Lost Sock Memorial Day

At Ease.

Now that mom is safely at home and resting from all the frivolity, be sure to honor the rest of these events appropriately. That’s an order soldier!

You started it Darth 29 Dec 2009 @ 20:29

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana , comments closed

From one of my weekly humor lists:

If you see a fat man
Who’s jolly and cute,

Wearing a beard and
a red flannel suit,

And if he is chuckling
and laughing away,

While flying around
in a miniature sleigh,
With eight tiny reindeer
to pull him along,

Then let’s face it…

Your eggnog’s too strong!

As we rejoin our show, already in progress… 12 Jun 2009 @ 08:58

Posted by Supreme General Rayegun in : Americana, Life in the Southern Command HQ , comments closed

As the cameras fade in from black, we find ourselves on the Comm section of the local stardock. The lone figure seen is one Wizard Merlin, relegated to the graveyard shift of Comm Station duty…..remember, the rest of the crew is either dead or still on medical leave trying to mend from the recent devastation.

We can see where Merlin’s eyelids are very heavy, obviously he’s been hitting the Romulan Ale again…and possibly the late hour as well…….

Just as his chin hits the desk the comm speaker SCREAMS to life. The Wizard flings awake so violently he flips the chair he’s sitting in backwards and nearly passes out from the concussion of hitting his head on the floor of the station. The voice we can hear emanating from the now nearly non-functional speaker is that of Supreme General Rayegun.

Let’s join the conversion……

[RAYEGUN]: Damnit, who the hell is manning Comms!!! Answer me you sleaze ball or you’ll be scooping shit at the Democratic Convention from now till eternity!

[MERLIN]: Ummm, ummm….{shakes his head to try and clear his addled brain} Merlin here General. Ummm, uhhhh….Can I assist you with something?

[RAYEGUN]: MERLIN!! What the hell are YOU doing on Comms? And have you been hitting the Romulan Ale AGAIN????

[MERLIN]: Ummm, ummm….uhhhh, No sir. {prays that is the correct answer}
And after the little war as well as the fall of the Pegasus it’s been a bit scarce to find qualified comm techs to watch the subspace channels and all.

[RAYEGUN]: Fine. {Merlin wipes his sweat-ridden brow} Where’s Darth? He needs to be made aware that I’ve finally returned from my extended TDY in the Gamma Quadrant.

[MERLIN]: Ummm, he’s unavailable at this time General, sir.

[RAYEGUN]:WHATTTT!!!!!! {the comm speaker nearly explodes from the console}
Well be sure he gets the message as soon as he is AVAILABLE!! I’ll be in my office if anything comes in.

[MERLIN]: Ummm, {hic} yessir.

[RAYEGUN]: MERLINNNNNNNNN!!!!!! {cameras and sound fades to black}

Yes folks, I’m back from a rather unplanned extended absence. There’s been quite a bit going on down here at the Southern HQ. First of which is that much like Darth, the General’s residence is in the process of changing locations. This is due to the impending nuptials next month (kinda also the reason for my disappearance). I won’t go into too many details here, but the General is a very happy camper again. The big day is July 25, 2009. The new Generalette-to-be is like-minded and would happily laugh at any of the “52 percenters” and their so-called “change”. She is also an elementary school teacher of almost 20 years who absolutely hates what the federal guvmint has done to ruin the education system.

After a week-long honeymoon in Hawaii, I will be posting much more frequently. For now, be on the lookout for some stuff that has been annoying the crap out of me. I’m sure you can guess what it concerns.

Keep the comm channels open.